*doctor delivers baby* congratulations its a healthy boy! *slaps butt and the baby starts crying* oh… how unfortunate, he’s a pussy ass nerd.. should i dispose of him or are you okay with this
(via pizza)
*almost chokes on food* *keeps eating*
(via pizza)
sher:
There is this iPhone app for Virgin media that contains a remote that allows you to control your TiVo box.
My brother is currently in the living room watching tv, I am in the dinning room with my iPhone remote. Every time he turns the tv on I turn it off. I can just hear him shouting and getting angrier and angrier because he had no idea what the fuck is going on.
This is the best thing i’ve ever done. 10/10 would recommend.
(via pizza)
A little rebellion now and then is a good thing.
—Thomas Jefferson (via fashionfever)
(via mysticmementos)(Source: she-burns-heaven, via mysticmementos)